Wednesday, October 10, 2012

No, I am not a nurse.

There's a set of parents whose very young infant is cared for by the NICU team I'm on. Now, I'm sure it's very difficult to have your firstborn child be born prematurely, and end up staying in the hospital for months, literally. However, I've gathered from my team that these parents have been exceedingly "difficult."
A number of incidents have occurred between my team and this particular family, including the family yelling at my residents in public, "firing" them for not doing a good job, and many other similar things. I have to say, though, that in my short interaction with this family so far, the one thing that bothers me the most is the fact that they address my residents, both of them, by their first names. It simply drives me up a wall, and I can tell it bothers my residents, both of whom are female, too.
I heard from many female medical students, before I started clinics, that I would more than likely be called "nurse" by many, many patients during my time in the hospitals. Luckily for me, I've actually rarely been addressed that way. Maybe I have some sort of aura that projects medical student-ness. Or perhaps I'm just not that much of a hottie, and let's be real--there's something distinctly "hot" about female nurses compared to many female medical students. Whatever the reason, I'm pretty glad for it. It's annoying enough when, as a brown-skinned person, you have veteran patients assuming you're Arab and apologizing to you whenever they speak ill of people from the Middle East. (For the record, I'm not at all bothered at being mistaken for a Middle Eastern person. I'm just miffed at the sheer ignorance of it all. For anyone who paid a modicum of attention, my name would probably strike him/her as distinctly Hindu.)
You know, call me an intellectual elitist if you want (cause, well, let's be real--I am one), but when I finally get my MD, I'll be damned if my patients address me as anything other than Dr. Spinenvy. By the time I'm a resident, I will have worked my tail off and gone through 21 years of schooling to earn the title of Doctor, and I'll sure as heck be working harder than ever before during residency. I think that at least some deference should be paid for that sort of hard work and commitment, and at least some of that deference takes the form of using the correct title to address doctors. Perhaps more importantly, when your patients do not address you as doctor, you have to wonder how, exactly, they perceive you. Doctors are, generally, respected, and believed to be knowledgeable experts in the field of medical care. If your patients call you "Angel" instead of "Dr. Spinenvy," then do they simply view you as an ineffectual girl? And if they do view you as such, then surely your recommendations and words don't carry the weight they rightly should, as recommendations coming from an MD.
I also have to say that I get extra riled up about all this stuff because there's still a large portion of society that automatically affords less respect to women than to men. Again, I've heard from plenty of female medical students (and residents) that they're referred to as nurse, even as they're wearing their white coats and making treatment plans for their patients, while their male counterparts are called doctor. It's frustrating that, outside of some circles, I'm met with confusion when I tell people I'm in medical school -- "So, you're going to be a nurse, or what?"
No. I'm not going to be a nurse. I'm going to be a doctor. Please call me that.

Disclaimer: I've met a great deal of awesome nurses, and I have to say that they have a type of strength and intelligence that I lack. I could never do the work of a nurse. I just want my patients to address me with my proper title once I've earned it, and I don't want to be relegated to the appellation, "Ms. Angel" simply because I'm female, while my male counterparts get to be called Doctor. That is unfair.

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